was in fifth grade, I received a poor grade on a math test. We’re talking really poor, like a fifty or
something along those lines, no higher than that for sure; an utter
failure. My parents would not have been
happy with a failing grade on a test.
Would they have grounded me?
Maybe, maybe not, but they would have been ashamed of their dunce of a
son that could not manage more than a measly fifty on a test. So I hid it.
I was so full of shame that I hid that test in the top of my locker and
I “buckled down” and wound up cruising through the rest of school with high
honors. Was that a scholastic turning
point for me? I don’t know if I would go
that far, but I’m sure that if my parents praised everything that I did, good
or bad, that I may have let that grade slide, not seen it as a sign that maybe
I should pay attention a bit more and concentrate on my schoolwork, and instead
continued down that slippery slope until I was asking “would you like fries
the decisions I made in my youth, and still make today for the most part, are
made with shame in mind in the form of: “Will what I do bring shame to me
and/or my family”? By having that run
through your head, it tends to take a bit of the impulsivity out of one’s
actions. I believe that that sense of shame is not a
bad thing, instead coming from a general understanding of right and wrong and
social etiquette. Am I going to pick my
nose in public? No, because it is not
socially acceptable and carries a bit of shame with it. Am I going to sit on my ass and collect
welfare for the rest of my life?
No. Same reason.
are many reasons that people can feel the opposite, having little or no
shame. They could have been brought up
in a household where their parents had no shame, and therefore instilled none
in their children, or they could have been brought up in a household with these
new-age yuppie parents that think their children shit gold and can do no wrong. All this does is lead to spoiled, entitled
brats with little to no real skills or work ethic, or any real desire to better
themselves because they’ve never had to.
Everything they have done has been good enough, and when you are
perfectly willing to settle for “good enough” and that has even been celebrated
by the adults in your life, it’s hard to transition to wanting to be better. Is it a coincidence that you can usually spot
the people that are long-term welfare abusers?
The people that have no pride or respect for their home or their
appearance, the people that think that cat piss is just the new fragrance from
Calvin Klein or the people that talk a lot on social media, trying to drum up
an inordinate amount of support for everything they do in order to validate
themselves. This is because if they have
lost the requisite amount of shame to not take long-term handouts from anyone,
then they have probably lost the requisite amount of shame to realize that when
your clothes are holier than the pope it’s time to retire them. You can probably see a lot of these people
around the first of the month at any Wal-Mart across the country.
in no way condemning everyone that is on public assistance as there are many
different reasons that people are in that situation. It is, however, condemning those that use
public assistance (or anything they’re not working for such as child support or
alimony) as their only source of income.
there’s a difference between shame and bullying. First of all, no one should shame a child but
an adult (preferably a parent), and an adult needs to realize that you’re not
shaming someone to tear them down completely and leave them a puddle of
tears. Shaming a child, or telling that
child that you are ashamed of them because of an action deemed reprehensible
based on our social mores, should be done as a matter of fact. “That test score is unacceptable, you are
smarter than that. Now you’ll have to
buckle down and study harder” is much different than “You big dummy. Do you want me to get Velcro shoes for you
too, or can you handle the laces?” Obviously
tact is important in everything, but especially here where you are not trying
to make an enemy of your child, but you are trying to make it so they realize
that bringing home a test with a shitty grade (as in the example above) or just
making poor decisions in general will cause you to feel ashamed.
obviously will only work if you praise the crap out of them when they do
something exceptional. They’re a solid
90 student but pull out a 100 on an exam?
Go nuts with your praise and congratulations, not money, that’s silly,
but praise will do it. If you give them
money just for getting good grades, then they will most likely grow up thinking
that if they get good grades in college they are owed high paying jobs when
they graduate, which is silly as no one owes anyone anything (the sooner your
kids realize this, the better).
endgame here is to get where I was in fifth grade, to have that shame take over
to the point where your child wants to better themselves, not to the point
where they want to kill themselves though, that’s silly. The idea is to create a sort of self-policing
within the child, so that they grow up and think twice about their actions, and
what it could mean in the long run to them in terms of shame. Let’s not forget about adults either, they
could do with a healthy dose of shame themselves, isn’t that right Miley?
Please note, the names in italics are the
movie/comic/cartoon/game that the villain appears.
Comic Book Region:
Dr. Doom Fantastic
Four (1) v.
Matt- No contest here. Kingpin has a corporation but Doom is the
ruler of a country, add to that the elements of magic and brains that Kingpin
just doesn’t possess and it should be a runaway.
Sinestro Green Lantern
Loki Thor (9)
Matt- While a nine over an
eight is far from an upset, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Loki win this,
especially given the higher profile he has received since the Marvel movies put
him in the spotlight.
Nik- Loki will absolutely
take this one. With how much everyone loves him from the movies? No chance.
Everyone’s saying “Who’s Sinestro?” already.
Four (5) v.
Green Goblin Spider-Man
Matt- Galactus eats planets,
Green Goblin throws pumpkins…need I say more?
Nik- Yeah. Not much can
take on Galactus.
Magneto X-Men (4)
Red Skull Captain America (13)
Matt- This is quite the first
round match-up. The concentration camp
survivor versus the right hand of the Third Reich. As impressive as the backstory would be, I
have to say Magneto wins this one because of the simple fact that he has the
mutant ability to control the force of magnetism, while Red Skull is more or
less a Hitler cronie.
Nik- Just from movie
exposure alone, Magneto takes it. Also, way more bad ass.
As cool as Hugo
Weaving was as the Red Skull in the movie.
Thanos Various Marvel
Comics (6) v.
Ra’s Al Ghul Batman
Matt- Thanos is a huge
cosmically powerful being that loves death (literally, look it up) while Ra’s
Al Ghul, by way of his Lazarus Pit, can’t die.
Freaky how these matchups wind up, but I would have to give this one to
Nik- In terms of a fight,
Thanos would kick ass. But if we look at popularity, people won’t know who
Thanos is for another year…
I’m thinking Ra’s Al Ghul wins.
Lex Luthor Superman
Rasputin Hellboy (14)
Matt- Rasputin was the token
“non big-two” villain, but I don’t see him lasting past this round as even
without his exo-skeleton, Luthor is one bad mother.
Nik- Agreed. Luthor, in
almost any iteration, is pretty rockin’.
General Zod Superman
Apocalypse X-Men (10)
Matt- Apocalypse. Definitely.
He’s got four horsemen and constantly makes things difficult for all of
the Marvel universe, not just the X-Men.
Nik- Despite his silly
stint in the X-Factor comics in the 80s, I really dig Apocalypse. But, Zod may
have some serious fans out there. He’ll win this one.
Joker Batman (2)
Venom Spider-Man (15)
Matt- The Joker could have
been #1 on this list. Something about a
sadistic psychopath that just makes people love him as a villain, and I
agree. Look for a deep run from Batman’s
Nik- Joker. To the top.
Boris & Natasha Rocky &
Matt- Even the combined might
of Boris and Natasha can’t save them from Megatron.
Nik- Agreed. Boris &
Natasha are a little too silly to stand up to Megatron.
Mr. Burns The Simpsons
Aku Samurai Jack (9)
Matt- Mr. Burns is like the
Lex Luthor of Springfield, just incredibly old and frail. Regardless, I think that his schemes would
best those of Aku, plus if I get to hear him sing “See My Vest” again that
would be a bonus.
Nik- Mr. Burns. Way too
popular compared to Samurai Jack,
Doofenschmirtz Phineas and Ferb (12)
Matt- While Mumm-ra is one of
those classic, creepy 80’s villains, Doofenschmirtz may just have enough
current name recognition to take him out.
Nik- Never heard of the
second schmoe, so I’m picking Mumm-ra
Bluto Popeye (13)
Matt- Skeletor is one of my
all-time favorite villains. He has to be
given a lot of credit for his scheming ability, even though they are
consistently foiled by He-Man as well as Skeletor’s own bumbling
lieutenants. What does Bluto have? A beard and a bad attitude? Skeletor wins to scheme another day.
Nik- Skeletor. Although,
this might be an upset, to be honest,
I think Bluto might not be as helpless as
Gargamel Smurfs (11)
Matt- Unicron is a lot like
Galactus and for that reason, not only will he steamroll Gargamel, but he may
give Shredder a run for his money in the next round.
Nik- I abstain. Because
I’ve never heard of Unicron (I read it as Unicorn the first 5 times I looked at
it), and I kinda just don’t like the Smurfs.
Nik- I love the Powerpuff Girls, so I want to vote Mojo
Jojo for this. But I see Shredder going far in this region.
Krang Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles (7) v. Hordak She-Ra
Matt- I like Hordak as a
character, he’s a more ruthless version of Skeletor, one that actually won, so
I can see him winning this round, but I wouldn’t put it past Krang to make a
game of it.
Nik- Krang. No one knows
who Hordak is.
Cobra Commander GI Joe
Snidely Whiplash Dudley Do-Right
(Rocky and Bullwinkle Show) (15)
Matt- Snidely Whiplash is fun and all,
but we’re talking about the Cobra Commander here. Hail Cobra all the way.
Nik- Snidely may upset
here, but I think the Commander will top him.
Darth Vader Star Wars
Oogey Boogey The Nightmare Before
Matt- Sorry Oogey Boogey,
someone had to go down first.
Nik- Based on theme
songs, it’ll be a wicked close match. But unfortunately, I think Boogey goes
Chainsaw Massacre (8) v.
Freddy Krueger Nightmare
on Elm Street (9)
Matt- This one is tough. I think it would go to Leatherface based more
on the loose adaptation of Ed Gein that created the Chainsaw story, but it could really go either way, as Nightmare was also apparently based on
real events (loosely I’m sure).
Nik- Freddy Kreuger takes
this one. Dream powers, man.
Voldemort Harry Potter
Hannibal Lecter Silence of the
Matt- The only reason Lecter
isn’t a higher seed is the fact that he worked with the FBI on numerous
occasions. However that doesn’t diminish
his villainy and I wouldn’t be surprised to see him win this one based on sheer
Nik- I never saw Lecter
as a villain. Whereas Voldemort is nothing but. He who shall not be named takes
the taco on this one.
Sauron The Lord of the
Rings (4) v.
Khan Star Trek (13)
Matt- Choose whichever Khan
you like, the old one or the new one, but neither of them beat a being of pure
evil that had an all-seeing eye on the top of his tower. Sure he was apparently beat by a midget with
jewelry, but those are just semantics.
Nik- Despite my
complaints about the LoTR, Sauron wins this one, with a vengeance.
The Wicked Witch of the West
Wizard of Oz (11)
Matt- This is tough. While vampires have got a bad rap the last
few years thanks to Twilight, the
original is still the best. I’d have to
give it to him in a close one.
Nik- The original strigoi, Dracula wins it.
Alien Alien (3) v.
Gozer the Gozerian
Matt- The Alien is a ruthless
creature, that should win this whole tournament based on how it reproduces
alone, it will win this round fairly easily though.
Nik- As much as I love Ghostbusters, the xenomorph, as it’s
properly called, shall win easily.
Cruella DeVille 101
Dalmations (7) v.
Matt- She wants to skin
puppies to make a coat, he ruthlessly had his brother murdered (poor
Fredo). Based on my love of The Godfather, I’m just going to have to
pick Michael in this one.
Nik- Oh man, if Cruella
DeVille were from a Grimm fairy tale… how cool? But Michael Corleone has to
take it for being so bad.
John Doe Se7en (15)
Matt- I love the
psychological horror that John Doe visits upon everyone, but it’s hard to pick
against the Predator.
Nik- The Predator is just
too cool to be taken down so soon, despite how awesome Se7en was. This could be an upset, though.
Video Game Region:
Bowser Super Mario
Brothers (1) v.
Pac Man Ghosts Pac
Matt- This should be an easy
one for Bowser. If it’s not then I’ve
lost faith in the decision-making abilities of all humanity.
Nik- Agreed. In both
Wario Super Mario
Brothers (8) v.
Donkey Kong Donkey
Matt- This may be an
interesting one as both villains have played hero-type roles in their own
games. I would still give the slight
edge to Wario based on his more recent villainy.
Nik- Wario annoys the
hell out of me, and I think it’d be a nice nod to DK to acknowledge his roots.
Ridley Metroid (5)
Reapers Mass Effect (12)
Matt- The Reapers are giant
alien machines while Ridley is a Pterodactyl-looking alien. I give this one to Ridley.
Nik- Yeah, Ridley’s
pretty cool for this one.
Eggman Sonic the
Hedgehog (4) v.
Sigma Mega Man X
Matt- People are likely more
familiar with Eggman than Sigma, so that should lead to his solid victory.
Nik- Eggman is a classic.
As much as I dislike the Sonic games, I know Eggman will play to a lot of
M. Bison Street
Fighter (6) v.
Shao Khan Mortal
Matt- Battle of the end
bosses. I like M. Bison to win a close
one on this.
Nik- Yeah, I think Street
Fighter takes it, for classic sake. Shao Khan is grittier, scarier, but I think
the shoulder pads will rock it.
Dr. Wiley Mega Man
King K. Rool Donkey Kong Country
Matt- Gotta go with Dr.
Wiley. He utilizes his jealousy of Dr.
Light to build and modify robots to dangerous levels while King K. Rool stole
Donkey Kong’s bananas.
Nik- Dr. Wiley is one of
the first video game villains I ever actually got to on my own. And he was
hard. So I’m going with him.
Goro Mortal Kombat
Sagat Street Fighter (10)
Matt- Goro should easily win
this. He was hands down the coolest
thing about the original Mortal Kombat.
Nik- Don’t you mean four hands down? Yeah, he’d win.
Ganon Legend of Zelda
King Dedede Kirby (15)
Matt- No contest. Ganon in a landslide.
Nik- Ganon. Or Ganondorf,
either iteration, he’d kick ass.