Thursday

This raced through my head at the time as well.  Gee thanks Dan Bailey!

Not so New Comic Review: Universe X – Four

                While Earth X was only fourteen issues long (1-12 with a zero and an X issue as bookends), it looks like Marvel gave Ross and Krueger a bit more room to flesh out the story with the addition of these “Special Issues” (there are five in total).  The thing is, you would assume that a “special” would only add tangential material to the story and not be as integral as the Universe X Special Issues are.  There are slight recaps of the action that goes on here in the regular issues, but really, these are very important issues if you want a better understanding of what is going on throughout the story (and the story is very convoluted and can get kind of confusing at times with so many moving pieces, so anything that can clear things up even a little is welcomed).

                The first “Special Issue” looks at the Fantastic Four as its main subject.  Considering how integral Reed Richards was to Earth X, this is not a bad idea.  Of course, this also means that we get another retelling of their origin (at least it’s only a quick one pager this time) as X-51 is relaying it to Galactus (who, it turns out, is now Franklin Richards).  We are then back in Doom’s castle, the home of the “Fantastic Four” (who are now down to two members).  We get more solemn Reed as he remembers his fallen bride, and then another brief flashback to show how Sue and Johnny died at the hands of Namor.  This is not just window-dressing though as it sets up Ben Grimm’s journey to Atlantis to consult with Namor.  Captain Marvel, as a child of Him and Her (I know, kind of weird) has been raised in Atlantis for the last few years to avoid the general population’s wrath at something new and different (they are no longer able to have children, probably due in large part to the mutations).  Ben Grimm, master of a restraint, decides to forego the fetch quest in order to beat up Namor one last time for what he did to Johnny and Sue.  Namor fights back, and actually knocks Ben’s breathing apparatus off.  If it wasn’t for Namor’s quick thinking, and the rescue breathing he learned in his seventh grade health class, Ben Grimm would be no more. 

 

                Be wakes up and is greeted by Mar-Vell, as a child of course.  Marv, makes some comments about Sue and Johnny, and then lets out the revelation that he is actually in both the land of the living (as a child) and the land of the dead (as a seemingly omnipotent god-being).  Apparently, Marv’s big plan is to make a new realm for the dead, a paradise, if you will.  The issue is, to do so from the land of the dead, he will need help.  All of the heroes in death’s realm, well most of them anyway, don’t think they are dead, they actually think those that are still alive are the ones that have died.  In order to exit the realm of the dead, they will need to realize where they are, which is easier said than done apparently, which we see as Johnny Storm, who realizes that he is dead, tries to convince his sister of that very fact.  Sue states that the only way she will admit to being dead, is basically if Dr. Doom admits it first, so off goes Johnny to get that done.  The way he does that is by removing Doom’s mask and showing him that he is no longer the scarred monstrosity that caused him  to put the mask on in the first place (apparently when you die, your physical scars disappear). 

                Back in the land of the living, Grimm has returned to Latveria with Marv to get Reed on board with the plan, and part of the way to do this is to bring Sue back from the dead (which is why she needed to acknowledge that she was dead in the first place (which she does, because Dr. Doom, realizing he is also dead, apologizes to her and asks for her forgiveness).  We then get a brief Dr. Doom origin story before Marv brings Sue back to life.  In order to recreate her, with her physical body being long since dead and decomposed, Alicia Masters molds Reed’s arm like clay (which is easy to do when he is as malleable as he is) into the form of Sue.  The final piece of the puzzle is taking Adam Warlock’s soul gem and giving it to Sue as a vessel to house her soul.  With that, Marv works his magic and Sue comes back to life.  Reed loses an arm, but that’s a small price to pay.  I do find it odd that the Sue that is now alive, has aged just as much as all of the other characters, but I guess it kind of makes sense since Alicia never really got to see Sue before her death.  With that, this issue comes to a close with a warning from Uatu that everything is far from over.

Next issue: everything is certainly far from over because Universe X #1 is forthcoming.  What is Marv’s plan, and why is he doing it?  Will Reed and Sue retire to Florida and live out the rest of their days together?  Will Uatu continue to be super creepy?

Slogan

Week Fourteen- (The Playoffs round 1-A)

Standings:

Shrimp:		Assorted Freaks:
The Masked Shrimp	7-6	The Slugomatic	7-6
Fred	9-4	The Wormy Guy	5-8
The Masked Shrimpette	6-7	Mr. Happee	5-8

Schedule: 

Round 1                                          Round 2

Fred

Shrimpette

Sluggy

Shrimpy

Loser Bracket:

Happee

Wormy

My favorite football seasons are the ones where the Giants are a punchline.

I'll Take Washed Up for $200

This was an actual Jeopardy question.  I figured it would be a perfect opportunity to insert Eli's stink face.  

Memorial Day

Hey Shrimpophiles, 

The gang at Eat @ Shrimpy's is taking a day off to honor our veterans, as should you. Regular strips will return tomorrow. 

Enjoy your barbecues. 

Eli's Back Up Plan

Poor "Not Peyton".

Not So New Comic Review: Universe X #0

                When last we left this alternate reality (Earth X #X for those keeping score at home), the planet had been saved not once, but twice, first from the Red Skull (thanks to Cap’s handiwork with his shield) and from the Celestials (thanks to Galactus’ handiwork with…well, being Galactus, I guess).  Not only that, but Reed Richards designed devices to remove the Terrigen mists from the air, thereby “curing” people of their mutation.  What do the heroes get for putting their lives on the line like this?  Uprising and revolt by the individuals that want to keep their powers.  So grateful.  Wait, a revolt against those sworn to protect you?  Where have I seen that before?

                Anyway, we have new narrators for this series!  While X-51 is busy being the new Watcher and Uatu, the old Watcher is busy being blind, we get Nighthawk, who has been gifted the power to be able to see the future by Mephisto because of some fancy eyes, and Gargoyle, who is writing all these future predictions down so that future generations can read them, kind of like writing a history book before the history happens.  After a brief introduction to our new narrators, we go to Latveria, and Reed is still heartbroken over Sue’s untimely death (many, many years ago at this point).  We also get the explanation from Reed that the elimination of the Celestial host in the center of the Earth has thrown off the polarity of the planet, basically making it opposite day everywhere.  The poles are warm and the equator is cold, and it will get worse, according to Reed.  We are also introduced to Him, also known as Adam Warlock, who has had a child with Her, the woman created to be his wife.  This is the first new child since the mutations, and people are a little freaked out by it, so much so that they have split up Him and Her in order to prevent them from doing it again.

                We now take a trip to the Savage Land, where the X-Men and the Hulk stumble across Sentinel City (which is exactly what it sounds like).  We then travel from the South Pole to the North Pole and see that the kingdom that Iceman created is melting.  We then fly over Africa and see that it is completely frozen over, save for a man-made biosphere that surrounds Wakanda.  We then head to the moon to see Thor trying to come to grips with what Loki told her in Earth X, that they are not technically gods at all.  We then travel to New York, where Steve Rogers is swearing in Marshall Muldoon as the President (after Norman Osborn’s untimely demise at the hands of the Red Skull in Earth X).  We peek in on Immortus, who is watching the whole thing unfold and get a glimpse at the big role he will play as well. 

                In Egypt, Moon Knight is fighting the Sons of Set in a never ending battle, while in England, the Black Knight (Black Bolt and Medusa’s Inhuman son) is becoming king.  In Japan, Xen, the ninja clan fights the Tong of Creel (which will come into play pretty huge in the coming issues), while in Russia, Colossus is coming to grips with the fact that his job as the world’s grocery store will soon be coming to an end with the changing weather patterns. 

                Back in New York, Angel visits Gargoyle and Nighthawk, bringing them food and supplies.  Angel has become a good Samaritan as his namesake suggests, helping others in their time of need.  He does do everything he can to avoid hearing the future from Nighthawk though.  He states that what killed the majority of the X-Men was the fact that they knew the future, and working to prevent it just brought it about at a quicker pace, which makes a lot of sense in an overall sense, not just related to the mutants. 

                After Angel leaves, we get an ancient history lesson, about the Skrull and the Kree.  The Skrull were apparently already an advanced race when they met the Kree, and actually were prepared to offer science and knowledge to whoever was able to create the greatest advancement on the Earth’s moon, between the Kree and the Cotati, a race of plant looking people.  The Cotati won, because, while the Kree were able to build a huge, technologically advanced city, the Cotati were able to cultivate part of the moon to sustain life (this is how Marvel’s fabled blue area of the moon came into being).  The Kree, being such sore losers, massacred the Cotati and took that technology for themselves, while also seeding a hatred for the Skrulls deep within themselves, one that would carry over into multiple conflicts for generations to come. 

                We are then treated to the life and eventual death of Captain Marvel, the Kree warrior, as a lead-up to the fact that the new baby that was born of Him and Her, is actually Captain Marvel come back to life.  He has all of the knowledge of his past life, but he is just a child.  We end on an image of Captain Marvel, as a child, and Captain America, his nanny of sorts traversing the frozen wasteland (my guess is it’s somewhere in New Jersey.

Next Issue: What are Cap and Cap doing in New Jersey?  And what is this whole story even about?    

Coulda Woulda Shoulda

What's that?  Aren't they violating the second rule of Men's Room Etiquette?

Yes, yes they are.

Music Review: Lynch Mob – Sun Red Sun

                Lynch Mob is one of the 80’s metal bands that were good at the time, but kind of on the fringe of the genre, not popular enough to really withstand the grunge onslaught of the 90’s fully intact, but good enough to come back when they all started to re-form in the late 2000’s.  George Lynch, former guitarist for Dokken, stayed with the band (it’s named after him after all) and continued to be one of the best guitarists you forgot existed, while vocalist Oni Logan left the band but returned for 2009’s Smoke and Mirrors, a nice little bit of nostalgia for those of us that still enjoy that kind of music. 

Sun Red Sun is similar in flavor to the previous Lynch Mob offerings, with a little more of a mature feel than the early 90’s work.  It’s a definitely a showcase for Lynch’s guitarwork, but with a little more balance than the first two albums in their catalog (the only early Lynch Mob recordings that I own).  The best track might be the cover of Bad Company’s “Burnin’ Sky” which the band covers faithfully without any additional flair.  There is a ballad (of course there’s a ballad) in the title track, but most of the other tracks are solid, heavy songs that hold up well against not only the rest of their discography, but also the other music of that generation.  Lynch Mob didn’t really change their style in their extended time off, and are therefore a lot more of a niche musical choice than they would have been twenty-five years ago (holy shit, I’m old) but they are still a band that puts out good music (when they are not broken up, that is).   

Giving Thanks

Week Thirteen-

Standings:

Shrimp:		Assorted Freaks:
The Masked Shrimp	7-5	The Slugomatic	6-6
Fred	8-4	The Wormy Guy	5-7
The Masked Shrimpette	6-6	Mr. Happee	4-8

Schedule:

The Masked Shrimp v. Fred

The Slugomatic v. The Masked Shrimpette

The Wormy Guy v. Mr. Happee

Thanksgiving was a bleak day for my fantasy football team as well.

Stupid Megatron riding the stupid bench...

Future Projection

There were a lot of games last year where the Jets failed to show up, so I would understand if you were confused.

Not so New Comic Review: Earth X #X

                This is it!  Being that this might just be the end of the world, there are no pleasantries like an origin story, or anything like that.  We jump right into the action.  First things first, we find that Iron Man was killed in his attack on the Celestials.  It took a little longer than expected, but he succumbed to his injuries.  We then see an awesome double page spread (and there are a lot of double page spreads in this issue) that shows Galactus facing off with the Celestials.  Overlaying that image is text of X-51 basically recapping the series so far. 

                As Galactus begins drilling into the Earth’s core, aware but oblivious to the presence of the Celestials around him, Namor rockets out of the ocean, free of the influence of the Skull, and as pissed off as Namor ever is, he calls upon the creatures of the ocean to attack a nearby Celestial, damaging it, but not really doing much harm. 

                On the moon, John Jameson has turned into a werewolf and is attacking everyone else on the moon (including his wife and child).  X-51 uses his teleportation door to send John to Earth, the part of it that is lit by the sun so John changes back to a human.  Of course, at this point, John’s wife gets angry with X-51 for sending John to a planet that is about to be destroyed.  Women, am I right?  Back on Earth, Silver Surfer’s lady friend, Shalla-Bal (the whole reason he became the herald of Galactus in the first place) is killed by the Celestials.  We are then shown the true power of Galactus, the Celestial-beating majesty.  We are also treated to a conversation between X-51 and Reed where we learn that Galactus really was turned into a star and the Galactus that is now on Earth is not the Galactus we all know. 

                The Celestials strike back and attack Galactus, wounding him.  However, through the conversation of Reed and X-51, we learn that the higher form of mutation that everyone is heading toward, after they all become shapeshifters, is a metaphysical one.  A mutation where the individual is basically what anyone thinks that they are.  This is a great way to reintroduce the Asgardians (the dead ones anyway) led by Loki.  He has made them all believe that they are not dead (because they aren’t) and they ride in to fight the Celestials…who promptly cause them to think they are dead again, so they all just drop into the ocean. 

                As the fight rages, we follow Reed as he teleports to the side of the Inhumans in order to not only tell Medusa that her husband is dead, but to also show her that her son, the one they have been looking for this whole time, was the black knight in Captain Britain’s care.  Black Bolt made Captain Britain promise to raise him and keep him safe until the return of the Inhumans. 

                Back in New York, Galactus rises and keeps killing Celestials, to the point that they retreat.  We then find out that Galactus, this Galactus is actually Franklin Richards in a higher form of his mutation.  Reed can’t talk to Franklin as his son though as that would shatter the illusion that Galactus is Galactus, thus throwing the balance of the universe in jeopardy.  Reed bites the bullet and speaks to Galactus as the world devourer, asking him to spare Earth.  Galactus agrees, does something, then leaves, vowing never to return.  I am not sure if he killed the Celestial embryo or not, as that’s never explained, but I would assume so, or else Earth is doomed anyway. 

                We travel to the moon, where X-51 has unraveled the mystery of the Watchers.  Apparently, as penance for not stopping the birth of Galactus, the Watchers are forced to be nursemaids to the Celestial embryos for all time.  This is why Uatu gave Reed the Ultimate Nullifier in the first place, to do away with Galactus once and for all.  X-51 then removes all of the monitoring devices from Uatu, he can no longer even hear what is going on on Earth.  He is completely blind and alone.

                Back on Earth, Reed has come up with a way to remove the Terrigen mists from the air.  Each country is to build a giant torch that basically burns the mists away, making the population of the Earth human again.  There is nothing said as to whether this will only work on those that received their powers through the mists or not, as all the mists did was apparently activate a dormant seed inside humanity, that was activated by other means in other heroes.  Not everyone is building a torch though, as Black Panther would rather have weird animal people because of his religious beliefs.

                Towards the end, we see Captain Mar-Vell come to Reed in a dream, telling him that he is coming back from the dead, very Jesus-y, and to prepare for his return.  We end the series with Luna, Quicksilver and Crystal’s daughter gaining her final form, just in time for Cap to light the torch and remove the Terrigen mists from the atmosphere.

                While this entire series was very well conceived, it got a little long-winded in places and dragged on at times before getting to the good stuff.  The art was great, both in terms of the character designs as well as the actual narrative art.  The colors were dark, muddy and did little to help the book though.  Of everything, the coloring was the worst part of the book, but everything else was pretty well done, with the highlight being Cap’s monologue in issue twelve.

Next: We check out the return of Mar-Vell in Universe X!    

Back Up Plan

Fred had quite the embarrassment of riches this season, just like our league's eventual winner.

Late to the Party Video Game Review: Super Smash Bros. WiiU

                I’m old enough to remember the first iteration of Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 64, and while I am no connoisseur of fighting games, I enjoyed seeing Mario versus Donkey Kong, etc.  Personally, I thought Super Smash Bros. Brawl for the Wii was the perfect fighting game.  It had great characters, the fighting game aspect was everything you remembered and loved about the series and the sidescrolling adventure that mixed in classic gameplay with bouts of fighting was the perfect addition to make it a fun game for the single player.

                Nintendo smartly decided to create a new Smash Bros. for the WiiU, adding more characters and beautiful graphics to go along with their new system.  Unfortunately, they replaced the sidescrolling adventure mode with a Mario Party-esque digital board game.  I played it, and I have to admit, for 90% of it I had no idea what was going on, until it was time to fight.  That was the biggest let down of the game, because at that point, there’s not much left to the game for the single player.  Is it fun to fight against your friends (or in my case, my son, who always has to be Little Mac for some reason)?  Of course it is.  Beyond that though…there’s not much to keep me there.  It’s fun to pick up every once in awhile and try out a new character, play through the game with a new set of moves, maybe even try to master the Duck Hunt Dog or Wii Fit Trainer, but beyond that, it doesn’t hold a lot of replay value.

                The graphics are great, as expected, the controls are relatively easy (though easier with the WiiU pad than the stick controller) and the amount of and variance of characters is awesome.  Unfortunately, as fighting games are expanding to add longevity to their “shelf life” Super Smash Bros. U to a step back.  Even Mortal Kombat added different modes of play to keep things interesting. 

                One final word about the Amiibos, Nintendo’s “Toys to Life” game companions:  they are completely and utterly useless.  In Skylanders, you can play as the toys you collect, in Disney Infinity, you can play with the toys you collect, with Amiibos, you bring them in to the game to earn experience…and that’s it.  There have no utility in the game itself.  You can fight against them, sure, but why would I go out and buy a Donkey Kong Amiibo only to fight against it?  I want him on my team!  This, plus hearing that any progress made with the Amiibos in Smash Bros. needs to be erased before you can use them in the upcoming Marioparty 10 makes me wonder what the hell Nintendo is thinking.  The sculpts are great, they all look beautiful, for the most part, but where Skylanders seems to have perfected the genre from the get-go, Nintendo seemed like it threw something together to avoid being left in the dust.

                All in all, Super Smash Bros. WiiU is about what you’d expect from a fighting game, but not enough to make it a good next-gen fighting game.  I still love kicking ass and taking names as Bowser, but it’s nothing I would do with any real regularity.

One Yard

Week Twelve-

Standings:

Shrimp:		Assorted Freaks:
The Masked Shrimp	7-4	The Slugomatic	5-6
Fred	7-4	The Wormy Guy	5-6
The Masked Shrimpette	5-6	Mr. Happee	4-7

Schedule:

The Masked Shrimp v. The Masked Shrimpette

The Slugomatic v. The Wormy Guy

Fred v. Mr. Happee

That was a jerky thing to say.  Though, in Shrimpy's defense, Shrimpette can get a little hyper-competitive at times. 

Snow Day 2

Amen to that.  A Western New York 8 is a Syracuse 4 and a Los Angeles -15.

Not so New Comic Review: Earth X #12

                Our final origin story is that of Iron Man.  A character that has only played a peripheral role in the story so far but takes center stage now as he goes up to face the Celestials in his Iron Man house armor. 

                In one of the best pages in the series, we see a double page spread of the Celestials standing over the New York City skyline while the reactions of the heroes are all shown in small panels on the bottom of the page.  This is a magnificent illustration that shows not only how large and foreboding the Celestials are, but also how small and meaningless the super heroes of Earth actually are in the face of gods. 

                We follow this up with Iron Man running toward the fight, hurtling his armor, which is still miniscule compared to the Celestials, at the giant robot-looking creatures.  As Iron Man fights a losing battle on Earth, we travel to Asgard, where Loki has traveled to try and explain to Odin and the rest of the Norse gods assembled there that their life is essentially a lie.  No one believes him, of course, as they have lived their lives for this long with no reason to believe anything different.  Instead f staying and reasoning with them, Loki does exactly what you might expect and kills himself, traveling to death’s realm.  What will become of this, I’m not sure, as we only have one issue left. 

                On the moon, John Jameson seems to have been brainwashed by Uatu, and begins brandishing the Ultimate Nullifier about.  Down on Earth, we see Iron Man’s last stand, except somehow, some way, he survives a suicide mission.  As he collapses in agony, thinking that he has not bought enough time for Earth, he is proven wrong, as the Silver Surfer and his lady friend show up.  That can only mean one thing, right?  Before we get to that though, we head back to the moon where the moon has come out, turning him into a werewolf (don’t ask).  The transformation causes him to drop the Ultimate Nullifier, which is caught by X-51.  We then end with the image of Galactus in the night sky.  I thought Reed killed Galactus, turned him into a star, you might say.  Well, we’ll just have to see who this is if it’s not Galactus.  But it should be noted that when Black Bolt called someone before he was killed by the Celestials, this is who he was calling. 

                The appendix this month is Cap laying the Skull to rest, speaking to him and telling him not only Cap’s origin, but that of the real Red Skull as well.  It is one of the most poignant and beautiful moments of the series as Cap deals with survivor’s guilt, PTSD and everything else that an old soldier who has seen as much action as Captain America could expect to have.  The fact that the Skull’s real name is James, much like his former partner, may be the tipping point that caused him to be so introspective.  While this doesn’t really do anything to further the story per se, like the other appendices did, it is a great set piece that perfectly illustrates the toll that all soldiers have to endure.

Next (and final) Issue:  It all comes to an end.

Snow Day

I feel like this really captures the relationship between Shrimpy and Sluggy, and I didn't even have to draw anything! 

Portfolio: April

April:
Masters of the Universe

Anyone that knows me well must have known that this was coming.  Masters of the Universe is firmly entrenched in the "dream job" category for me, and always will be.  Hell, even before they were making Masters of the Universe comics again it was a dream job for me.  I wanted to be the one to resurrect the franchise.  At this point, I'll take a backup story, an online exclusive, hell, I'll take a variant cover, anything to live out my childhood dream of getting paid to draw He-Man kick some ass.

Still Seated

Poor Happee, and here he thought this would be a fun way to hang out and enjoy some football.  

Unlisted

It's disagreements like this that may have led to Jimmy Graham's exodus from the Saints.  

Or not, I'm no NFL reporter.