Also a true story

No lie, he actually said this to me.  While I didn't heed his advice, the guy was always smiling so there was apparently some credence to the "Jamaican Life" that he preached.

Hell’s Kitchen Episode Nineteen: And then there were…two…kind of

                For the past few weeks, my choice for the final two has been Mr. Mohawk and mixed up Cyndi.  They both seem like the most ready, the best fits for Ramsay’s restaurant at this time.  Was I correct in that assumption?  We’ll see, but first we have to get through the individual challenge.  This one started out with a puzzle, an actual puzzle that the contestants had to put together.  The team of Mr. Mohawk and squeaky voice completed the puzzle ahead of the other team of skinny black girl and mixed up Cyndi pretty easily and wins…nothing. Of course.  The real challenge is the now infamous “Taste it Now Make it” challenge in which Ramsay brings out a fairly simple dish with multiple components that each of the contestants need to get right.  The dish this year looked a little busy in terms of plating, but I’m sure it was delicious.  The three components of the dish that the chefs need to correctly guess is the protein, the puree and the vegetable.  Everyone thinks that the puree is butternut squash, which is incorrect as it is carrot puree.  So no one gets eliminated there.  The protein is what usually trips up the chefs in these competitions and this one is no different as Mr. Mohawk and squeaky voice are both eliminated because they didn’t choose venison as their protein.  Mixed up Cyndi chose venison and buffalo but only plated the venison so she lucked out.  It all came down to the vegetable.  Mixed up Cyndi had turnip while skinny black girl had parsnip I believe.  Mixed up Cyndi wins!

                For her reward she gets a $1000.00 shopping spree at a kitchen supply store in which she purchases a stand mixer for her mother, among other things.  She also gets a one on one lunch with Ramsay at his new restaurant “Fat Cow”.  The other contestants have to not only clean the dorms, but actually move stuff out, all the beds and everything and then set up for dinner service that night.  There aren’t too many surprises in the cleanup, except someone left their thong laying in the corner somewhere.  They didn’t say anything about it being able to tie a boat to shore so I’m assuming it wasn’t fat black girl’s but I could be mistaken.

                Mixed up Cyndi returns to the kitchen and dinner service begins.  This is the night that each chef gets to run the pass, expediting and plating food while being the “last line of defense” as Ramsay likes to say.  First up is mixed up Cyndi, who does an ok job of running things.  She does miss the fairly obvious blemish of crab substituted for lobster in the risotto, but she does keep food moving at a steady pace.

Mr. Mohawk on the other hand gets his ass handed to him.  He misses the white fish substituted for the scallops in the appetizer.  That is ridiculous though as I don’t know how anyone could really tell without tasting the dish, or squeezing the “scallops” and having them fall apart in your fingers.  He also was thrown a curveball by Jean Phillipe as a diner requested that the prosciutto not be included in the Beef Wellington.  That’s all well and good, except the Wellingtons are all pre-wrapped, so there’s no way that’s going to happen without them tearing apart a Wellington (which isn’t going to happen).  I think Mr. Mohawk got screwed here, is what I’m trying to say, and if he went home after this service I would be disappointed, but not surprised.   

Skinny black girl is up next and does a decent job of running things.  There’s not much to say because I think she caught the mistake by Chef Andy and ran a pretty tight ship.  The same can be said for squeaky voice as she caught a big screw up where the Chef Andy sent up a Veal Wellington instead of a Beef one.  She also caught many of the smaller mistakes presented by the other contestants, something that Mr. Mohawk was unable to do in his time at the pass.  That voice of hers served her well in this instance as she was able to be heard among the din of the kitchen and her orders were carried out correctly, probably to shut her up but I’m sure that was okay for her. 

Elimination time came next, and the first person to make it into the finals was squeaky voice!  She wasn’t my first choice but she did show that she could run the pass and improved every single service for the most part.  I’m okay with that choice.  Of course this meant that at least one of my frontrunners wouldn’t be going through to the final round.  We are treated to the revelation next as Ramsay sends home mixed up Cyndi.  This was a surprise to everyone as I was sure that not only was she going through to the finals, but that she would win the whole thing.  Ramsay mentioned her lack of assertiveness to be her downfall, which makes sense, it’s just kind of sad to see her go after she has done such a good job up to this point.

That leaves one spot open for two people.  Who’s going to face squeaky voice in the finals?  No one knows, at least not until next week when we get the whole finals experience.  The trip to Vegas, the choosing of new teams, the final reveal (though I wouldn’t be surprised if they expanded the finale to two weeks).  We’ll see!

See you next week!

Double Standard

Gotta love those double standards.

True Story

When I was a line cook at the hospital for the maternity floor, this would happen every single night.  The dietitian didn't want o walk from his office to the kitchen more than once or twice a night so he would horde orders for a good half hour to forty-five minutes and then drop them on me all at once.  

This is actually how I got the chef's job at the hospital as well.  I started out working in the cafeteria (I wasn't a volunteer like Shrimpy, I actually had a job there) and one night they were short a guy on the line and asked me to fill in once my shift in the cafeteria was over.  I said yes of course because, duh, overtime, but also because I love to cook (it was mostly for the money though).  Well I subbed that day and never went back to the cafeteria full time after that.  They kept me in the actual kitchen, mostly cooking on the line for the maternity floor, with other assorted duties that come with cooking in a large kitchen like that as well.  It would have been a feel-good story if it wasn't in a hospital kitchen for a couple bucks an hour.  That goes to show you though, if you get an opportunity to advance, take the reins and do it.  Knock their socks off and they will find a place for you.  

Comic Review: Red Sonja #1

                I read a short preview of Red Sonja about a month ago.  It looked intriguing at the time, so I decided that when it was actually released I would give the whole comic a shot.  While I find it odd that Red Sonja is a Dynamite Entertainment property while Conan the Barbarian is still under the Dark Horse umbrella (meaning the chance of seeing these two characters in the same comic, even though they technically live in the same, area is slim) I did find the premise interesting enough to give it a look.  Any time I can find a comic that takes me out of the traditional superhero realm, or at least the traditional superhero tale, I’ll do so.

Cover:

                I broke my own rule on alternate covers for this one.  Usually if there are multiple covers for one issue, I’ll grab the one on top of the pile so I don’t have any preconceived judgments about the cover other than the fact that it is the first one I see.  For this issue, I knew that there were a multitude of covers and I searched for the one by Amanda Conner.  There are a couple reasons for this.  One, she is a tremendous artist who has only gotten better as her career has progressed.  Two, as a former Kubert School student herself, it’s nice to be able to see someone make good on that “education”.  Three, I met Amanda at a small local convention back when I was going to school at the Kubert School and she was one of the nicest, most accommodating people I have met in the comic business (I met Tom Raney there too and he was just as cool).  So even though me buying that cover probably doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things, it’s nice to know that I supported one of the good people in the business in some small way. 

And finally, the cover is just beautiful.  The linework is clean and crisp, and the coloring is expertly crafted to reflect not only the light from the moon above but also the light from the fire behind.  There is so much detail in the cover and each different item has its own feel, its own texture to it.  The hair on her blanket and boots has a different feel than the foliage behind her and the leather of her boots and wine skins.  Not only that, but the hair on her head has a different texture than the other hair in the picture.  The more I look at the cover, the more I notice in terms of little bits and pieces of texture here and there within the piece.  Plus, and this can’t be overlooked, Conner drew a scene from the book itself.  This is not something you usually see from a variant cover as many in the past have tended to stick closer to the spot illustration of the main character kind of formula.  The fact that Conner took the time to craft her cover based on something that happens within the book shows more of a reverence for both the source material and the comic book medium than just simply slapping a figure of Red Sonja on the page and mailing it in.

10/10 – Conner shows why she is so sought after in the business and still (in my opinion) the best female artist working in comics.

Story:

                Gail Simone, mostly known for her DC Comics work, has crafted a story that not only shows how ruthless Sonja is, but how she got to be that way.  Yes, there is plenty of room left to expand upon her history and I am sure that Simone will do that, maybe even as early as issue two, but she does an excellent job of setting up not only the story she is trying to tell, but also the history from which the story is springing from. 

                I am not intimately familiar with the original story of Red Sonja, so I’m honestly not sure how this telling of her origin compares, but I do know that what we have here at this point is a very good story that makes Sonja’s expert swordwork and brutality plausible.  I’m not saying that it’s not a little generic (the woman that has survived the dungeon and the arena as a captive and unwilling combatant only to come out of it a ruthless fighter) but it is well presented.  I think it would have been less effective if we had seen the full story right away, from her capture to her incarceration, release and the immediate aftermath of that release.  Instead, we are shown snippets, only the essential bits to get the story rolling, and that helps to keep everything fresh and not make it seem like a recycled plot.  90% of stories are the same, it’s how they are told that makes the difference, and Simone has found an effective way to tell this one. 

                The dialogue is not the best part about the story in my opinion.  It may be the inflections that Simone tries to give the characters in the way they speak in order to show that they are from a foreign land, but there is very little flow to it.  It clears up a bit when the two women prisoners are released and we get to see what happens in the aftermath, however even then I’m not sold on the dialogue itself.  Also, the twist ending was met (by me at least) with an “of course it is” reaction.  Again, I have no idea if this is following the original story closely or not, but it’s pretty easy to see the cliffhanger coming.

8/10 – Simone does a good job of world-building and progressing the story at the same time.  The issues with the dialogue are minimal at best, and some of the telegraphed plot devices seem like they were mandated from the source material more than Simone’s own personal style (at least I hope).

Art:

                Walter Geovani handles the art duties on this book and he does a fine job at it.  For the most part, the storytelling is good and the anatomy work is spot on.  Anatomy is obviously a big concern when you are dealing with a titular character that wears little clothing, but he handles it well with her and all of the other characters in the book.  His female faces all look incredibly similar, but that’s really one of the only knocks against the artwork.  Geovani does an excellent job of transitioning between a battlefield to a dungeon to a forest to a city and back to a different battlefield while making them all stand on their own in terms of design.  His backgrounds are adequately spaced out, he doesn’t overload the page with panels chock full of background, but he also doesn’t limit the use of backgrounds.  Geovani finds that happy medium that not only tells the reader where they are (and continues to do so throughout the duration of the book) but he also reels it back a bit, allowing the figures to breathe a bit and stand on their own without being cluttered on the page.  This also allows the reader to take a small respite and not be overwhelmed by all of the detail, which could get confusing especially in the battle sequences.

8/10 – The similarity of the female faces is not a huge problem, and hopefully one that Geovani avoids in the future, but I will say one thing, the guy can draw the hell out of a horse.

Overall: 8/10 – This is a good book and looks like it will be a good series.  If you want something a little different than your standard superhero fare than I suggest you give this a shot.

                 

Hello Alan

Alan is a very real guy, and was one of the head chefs when I worked in the hospital kitchen in New Jersey.  Pretty much everything he says here in the strip, he uttered to me at one point or another.  Stay tuned for those nuggets of wisdom.

Hell’s Kitchen Episode Eighteen: The Non-Consensus

                Will someone finally be sent home for the love of all things Ramsay!?  It’s been nearly a month since an elimination (seriously, between last week’s repeat and the fact that this is part three of “Five Chefs Compete” it feels like forever since someone was sent packing).  Let’s see if Ramsay has finally had enough of his current crop of chefs and starts to whittle down some of the dead weight.

                We open with an individual challenge in which each of the chefs had to make their own gourmet burger.  Ramsay prefaces this challenge by showing them his own gourmet burger that he casually mentions can sell for upwards of $100.00.  Go back and read that again, I’ll wait.  That’s right, a $100.00 hamburger.  Holy shit what has happened to society when we are selling burgers for $100.00?  It’s not even that a chef would put that rich of a price tag on it, it’s the fact that we have people out there willing to shell out their hard-earned cash to keep it in demand enough for it to stay on the menu.  This thing had better be made out of endangered baby seal meat with an orphan-tear aioli and tomatoes grown in the ashes of holocaust victims (too soon?) for me to even consider paying that much for a hamburger. 

                Okay, rant over, I feel better now.  The competition itself is not just a standard “make your burger and Ramsay will judge it along with one of his colleagues” though.  Instead, Jean Phillipe, the snooty Maitre D has invited a bunch of his friends to the restaurant.  They will all taste the burgers and vote on their favorite.  Upon completion of the tasting, Ramsay reveals everyone’s least favorite burger (blonde girl, which is not that surprising) and then states with forty percent of the vote, which based on the fact that there were five people competing is a crazy number, Mr. Mohawk wins.  His reward is a spa day and he is allowed to bring one of the girls with him.  He chooses mixed up Cyndi because (as he says) “She’s one of the guys”.  This kind of makes sense, because I have no doubt the other three would be talking his ear off the whole time.  Well played Mr. Mohawk.  Not only that but these two are the strongest chefs and most likely to land in the top two, so banding together now would help them in the long run. 

                While Mr. Mohawk and mixed up Cyndi get their facial on (it’s not as dirty as it sounds) the rest of the chefs have a laundry list of stuff to do as Ramsay has given Jean Phillipe and his staff the day off.  This includes steaming the tablecloths, setting up the dining room and even washing Jean Phillipe’s car.  Not only that, but then they have to set up for dinner service that evening.  That’s a lot of work for only three people in the time allotted, but through the magic of television they get it all done.

                The dinner service is a mess compared to the previous one where the chefs narrowly lost out to the returning champions.  It is not really as bad as where the chefs came from (they completed it, so that’s a plus) but it is still not up to par with where they should be and far below Ramsay’s standards.  Mr. Mohawk and mixed up Cyndi have a solid outing (maybe because of spa day, I don’t know for sure) but the other three are train wrecks.  Squeaky voice sends up shitty fish, skinny black girl sends up risotto that elicits a reaction I’ve rarely seen from Ramsay.  When he tastes it, it looks like a baby shit in his mouth, his reaction is that pronounced.  Blonde girl decides that she wants to be “Top Chef” for the day and starts firing tickets.  The main problem is that she is firing the entrees on tickets in which the tables are still waiting for their appetizers.  Ramsay hands her his apron and walks out of the kitchen, leaving her to run the pass and her garnish station.  I will give her a little credit, she actually does it.  I mean, food goes out and we don’t see any of it coming back.  How much of that is her leadership as opposed to everyone else just upping their game, I don’t know for sure. 

                Elimination time comes and Ramsay asks for two nominees.  Everyone is in agreement that squeaky voice should go up.  She’s a good chef but this was by far her worst service.  The last spot has a split vote between skinny black girl and blonde girl.  The only problem is that it’s impossible to have a split vote when you have an odd number of people.  I have no idea how that happened, and Ramsay apparently doesn’t care as he calls up all three of the chefs and sends blonde girl home.  Before she goes, he does state that he may have a job for her in the future if she keeps cooking and keeps her passion.  This is news to me as I didn’t think Ramsay was really into the McDonalds franchisee thing, but to each his own I guess.

                Next time, with the four strongest chefs left in the competition, two get eliminated after they each get their chance to run the pass.  Is there sabotage, intrigue, bad food in store?  We’ll see next time (or we probably won’t).  Only a couple more episodes to go!

                See you next week.