One thing
that I notice a lot lately is the massive amount of religion that has invaded
facebook. I am not religious in any way,
but I went to church growing up and hit all of the Roman-Catholic milestones on
the way. While I do not begrudge my
father for forcing that upon his children, the fact that it is being forced
upon adults in ever so shitty ways makes me both shake my head and get kind of
punchy. Let me make something clear, I
do not care what religion you are, or how far ingrained in that religion you
are, you could be a Christmas/Easter Catholic or someone that goes to church
everyday and does not leave home without a Bible/Prayer Book etc. What I find to be ridiculous is when that
love of religion that you have is shoved down my throat in the form of your
forwarded facebook posts.
I am not
talking about the bluntcard meme things that take up way too much of everyone’s
time and energy to find and read. Those
are dumb, and the people that post ten to fifteen of them on their own page per
day are dumb as well (especially if they are over the age of 16). What I am talking about is the “like this
post and you side with Jesus, ignore this post and you are Satan’s butt-buddy”
posts that pop up from time to time.
Like I said, I don’t care how fanatic your religious leanings are,
putting that on your own page and sharing it with all of your “friends” proves
that you, my friend, are a dumbass.
Liking your fucking facebook post will have no bearing on my eternal
soul. If I really believed in all of
that, I may be offended by your assumption that what you post on your wall has
any bearing on me whatsoever. You should
know two things about me. 1. I am not easily offended by anything, and
2. I find that the best way to deal with
that kind of fanaticism is through humor and, if I may use a term that will
probably get me stoned (the bad kind not the good kind), bullying. You are trying to bully me into liking your
post so that I don’t have to get a pineapple shoved up my ass for all eternity,
well bullying is a two way street and I can be very effective at it.
You, oh
religious nut, are a sheep. Anyone that
clicks on that post is a sheep. And for
that matter, anyone that clicks on those posts about veterans or cute animals
is a sheep as well. Of course we want
the veterans to be safe, of course that cat wearing sunglasses is cute, why
must the request be made to like your stupid photo? More importantly, why are people falling in
line like Jews to the oven in order to like something that someone else tells
them to? Your blind devotion to cute
animals, veterans or the feeble promise of saving your immortal soul makes you
mindless, thoughtless sheep.
As if to
prove me right, directly after writing this article I checked my facebook
account and lo and behold, a posting proving me right. Hold on to your nuts because this one is a
doozy. “Hit like if you love your
grandma, ignore if you want your grandma to die”. Yup.
Not liking their stupid fucking post is apparently a death sentence for
grandmothers everywhere. It’s like the
“step on the crack break your mother’s back” children’s rhyme but amongst
people that should know better – and yet they don’t.
Have an
opinion of your own. If you want to like
a photo, try liking one that does not come with the stigma attached to it, or a
requirement for liking it. You know who
else has certain requirements like that?
Cult leaders. Yup. Quit drinking the fucking facebook Kool-Aid!
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